Saturday, October 25, 2008

In the realms of uncertainty..


I can only start from where i left off in my last post. Yes, time is running out. In this slow times in my life, apparently things are happening very fast, although not that fast yet, where my own life is concerned. I thought that our farewell day at college will hurt the most to me.For I will never get back those moments which I spent with my friends in the past 4 yrs. But still the attachment, the contact remained for these past few months. We met more than a few times, enjoyed ourselves in each others company as much as we can and at times it looked like this will continue for quite a few days more.I started to believe , that the end of college life is not the end of all.But from now on, that precious little attachment will have its days numbered, literally. Most of my friends have finally received the call letter, from the software giant TCS. They can now have a sigh of relief.The boredom is finally going to end for them. Here comes an end to their post-college life.The corporate world beckons.And they are visibly excited for obvious reasons. In a few days we might have a nice little farewell for them.God knows, if me and my friends from Wipro will get any sort of farewell. To big a thing to hope for I guess! It is really going to hurt now, to the core.
Anyway, I went to college today. It doesn't look the same to me anymore as it used to , until only a few months back. No rush , no familiar faces, no chit-chat, no hulla-bulla. Everything looks new. The ease with which we used to enter the college premises is gone. I have to sign my name, write my purpose, entry time and all those things a stranger does to get permission to enter.Yes, my identity as a student is gone. I am nothing less than a stranger now. Though its not relatively new. My friends and I have accepted this fact long back. So, me and my friend went to the new building they finished right around the time when our own bond with the college ended. Our dept is right at the very top, 5th floor. I consider myself lucky that I didn't have to attend my classes here that much. Anyway, the purpose was project money, the money which we should have got back long back if not for the lack of concern on part of this hopeless professor of our dept. We thought we might have to bear him for atleast half an hour before he lets us go.He is fond of guys. Well, kind of. I don't want to dwelve on it any further.But amazingly we were out of that room in about 5 mins.Yes it was truly a miracle although we were left with Rs 300 less than what we expected.But atleast Rs 900 per head is in our pockets!
Anyway, our job was complete in super quick time. We left the college within 25 mins after we had entered.On our way out, the guard at the gates recognized us as the alumni of the college. Something to be happy about, atleast somebody remembers me! its not my last trip though, i still have some unfinished job in college.
In the evening i was disturbed to hear about the problems a friend of mine has got into.He is also a TCS guy. The joining date is on 10th Nov at trivandrum, while the C-day is on 16th. With trivandrum being not a well connected place through flight routes, he is in for some trouble about how would he be able to make the round trip journey from trivandrum to kolkata.Here i am, right here in kolkata, concerned about how to locate my centre in an unheard place called basavangudi in Bangaluru.And there he is, struggling to find a smooth passage back to his own home. God does play some cruel jokes on us at times! Its all part of our destiny. Some things are simply out of our control.I still believe ,we control our own fate. But when fate itself intends to play tricks on us, we are left helpless. I have to admit, at this point of time, I don't have much control either. The situations are controlling me instead. But I don't mind that as long as I don't lose faith in myself.I don't mind a bumpy road as long as god gives me the necessary strength to keep going. Please stay with me lord, thats all what i want of you in this uncertain period of my life.

2 comments:

Tanmoy said...

Hi Arnab, First thanks for visiting my blog. I was reading through your post and would tell you - keep posting. There isn't much where I can comment but I would wish you well in the tricky times you seem to have been facing. I am in it virtually for sometime now. It dents one a little but we cannot help it or can we?

Regards
Tanmoy

arnab said...

Thanks for ur wishes.It certainly becomes very difficult to keep one's spirits up during these tricky times,when almost nothing seems to go right no matter however hard one tries.But we should certainly try to remain optimistic.It is these tough times which makes us stronger than ever when we are finally over with it!